How often do you notice the voice in your head, telling you things you don’t want to hear? This is known as negative self-talk and it can affect you when you’re on duty, in training, or in personal relationships. That’s why it’s so important to learn strategies to transform negative self-talk into a positive force for growth and military performance.
Your inner voice is helpful in many situations, such as when you remember phone numbers, rehearse for a presentation, or coach yourself through another rep at the gym. Your inner voice is the ultimate problem solver and can guide you through challenges and demanding missions. But if you don’t know how to harness your inner voice in a healthy way, it can sometimes feel like an uncontrollable force working against you, filling you with negativity and doubt. Fortunately, scientists have found strategies to help you take control of your inner voice.
Use third-person language and distanced self-talk to boost performance
Try making a small change when you talk to yourself, and shift your language from “I” to your name or “you.” For example, instead of saying “Why am I so distracted?” ask, “Why is Mark so distracted?” This technique reduces chronic worry and improves emotional regulation, leading to better performance under stress. Saying things to yourself like, "You’re going to be okay" can make a challenging situation feel easier because you’re tricking your brain into believing that you and your inner voice are separate beings. Another effective technique is to give yourself the advice you would give a friend. We're usually much kinder to our friends than ourselves, so ask yourself, “Would I ever say this to one of my friends?” Then you can adjust your word choices, if needed.
Journal to improve clarity and strategic problem-solving
Documenting your thoughts and emotions can create meaning from your streams of self-talk. Journaling about a challenging situation can give you valuable insight and perspective and improve your “inner conversation.” Journaling can give your thoughts a place to go, instead of crowding and overwhelming your head. Fully embracing and unraveling your experience from the perspective of a narrator can also provide you with distance and help you worry less over time.
Experiment with one of these 3 journal prompts below for 30 minutes a day for a few consecutive days to see what works best:
- Instead of looking at a situation as a threat or frustration, try a challenge journal prompt: Ask yourself about the ways to overcome a current challenge—and answer with detailed instructions. It can help to write in the past tense, as if you’ve already overcome the challenge, outlining the steps it took you to do so. This can also help you look forward to the next steps you should follow and make your frame of mind more hopeful.
- People usually experience negative self-talk when they narrow their focus to the specifics of a situation. Try writing a journal entry comparing the current situation with more significant difficulties you've faced in the past. This is a great way to avoid overestimating the current situation’s importance and zoom out.
- Write about how a role model would deal with a similar situation. Get detailed about the ways they would perceive the situation, talk themselves through it, and take action to tackle the issue. This is another way to help you broaden your perspective and create steps to overcome the challenge.
Try these quick journal prompts if you’re short on time:
- Write 5–10 affirmations. This will help motivate and remind you of the best version of yourself that you already are or want to be.
- Journal about the ways you’re hard on yourself in the current situation or similar situations. Follow each with small steps you can take to change these behaviors.
- Journal about a few of your primary values. This is another great way to put the situation into perspective and remind you where your priorities really lie.
Digital detox for stress reduction and performance enhancement
Social media can be fun and give us a way to connect with the people who are important to us. But it can also make us feel bad about ourselves. When you scroll through your feed and see highlights of everyone’s lives, your inner voice may start spiraling, especially if you’re operating from a negative mindset from the start. The overarching goals when using technology should be to use it in appropriate ways that allow you to have meaningful connections with members of your network, to decompress, or to learn. When using technology doesn’t seem to help, substitute the behavior with healthier habits proven to reduce stress and improve well-being, such as the ones below.
- Practice a ritual. Negative self-talk is often associated with a sense that you’re losing some control, so seeing order in the world can make your life more predictable and easier to navigate. You can create order and boost feelings of self control by practicing a ritual. A ritual consists of a series of actions performed according to a prescribed order. Some rituals to try are meditations, chanting, breathing techniques, or a set of stretches that move your body. Another way to create order is by decluttering and tidying up your work and home spaces or making a to-do list.
- Get outside. Going on outdoor walks or runs and being in nature provides stimuli that draw your attention in and moves your worry away from the stressor. Exploring the outdoors can help you clear your head and help you regulate your negative inner voice. Spending time in green spaces has been shown to reduce stress and improve well-being, so try adding some greenery, such as plants, in your work and living spaces.
- Find awe in the world. Have you ever been so amazed by something like art, scenery, history, or technological developments that you’ve become flooded with emotions? That’s called awe! When your inner voice is spiraling, seeking out awe-inspiring experiences can help lift your spirits and direct your attention away from the stressor and toward the experience. Silence your phone for an hour and explore what brings on the feeling of awe within you.
These techniques aren’t one-size-fits-all. It's important to try different strategies and see what works best for you when you’re creating your routine. With enough practice and dedication, you’ll be able to transform your self-talk for the better in no time.
Check out more HPRC articles for self-talk strategies here:
Optimize performance through positive self-talk
Optimize performance with goal-directed self-talk
Optimize your self-talk for peak performance
Additional resources
A guided meditation
The impact of social media on performance and mental health
Intro to paced breathing
Mindfulness meditation primer
Optimize mental health and relationships with meditation
Published on: August 1, 2024
Reprinted with permission from https://www.hprc-online.org/mental-fitness/mental-health/try-these-techniques-positive-self-talk-and-improved-performance